We’ve all been there. You meet someone you like, really hit it off, you’re talking and texting, and then the first date hits – it’s a nightmare. It’s either awkward, or hard to talk, or something just feels wrong. Unfortunately, a bad first date usually means no second date. So how do you do it? How do you have the perfect date?
Well, everyone has a different idea of the perfect date. So while we may not be able to tell you exactly what your new crush wants, we do have some tips on how to make sure your first date runs as smoothly as possible.
Go Somewhere You Can Talk
This may seem like a no-brainer, but you’d be surprised. Even if you two have been texting for a while, it’s important to see how or if you can communicate in person. Some people are horrible texters but extremely conversational in person. So if you go somewhere where you can’t have good conversations, it can be hard to tell.
So what do we recommend? Try a coffee date! Almost every girl or guy loves coffee. And it’s something where you can sit and chat for a while. The best thing about a coffee date is it only had to last as long as your cup is full, but it can last so much longer if you’re having a great time.
What do we not recommend? Don’t go to the movies on the first date or, even worse, don’t watch Netflix on the first date. While the movies can be a great second or third date, they don’t allow for conversation, so the whole “will they put their arm around me” thing can be awkward. After all, you don’t want your first date to be something out of a romantic comedy! And in today’s world, going to someone’s house to watch Netflix on a first date may make it seem like you’re not interested in an actual relationship.
Let Them Talk
If you’re anything like us, you love to talk. And this isn’t a bad thing! But you have to make sure the other person talks as well. We bring this up because if sometimes you’re a talker, you occasionally forget that this is a conversation involving two people and that the other person might like to talk as well.
In order to have the perfect date, you should both talk about equally. Letting your date talk about themselves will make them feel as though you care, and also people just love talking about themselves. So make sure you ask your date questions about themselves and make sure you actively listen to their story!
If you’ve been texting this person for a while, they probably know that you’re interested. However, body language can change this. If you guys are always talking but then on the first date you’re not facing them or not getting close at all, they might begin to question if you like them or not.
So to avoid this, make sure you’re showing you’re interested through body language! Make sure you’re facing them and making eye contact during conversations. If you’re sitting and chatting, make sure that you’re leaning in and looking at them while they speak. Make sure you give them positive body language and your full undivided attention – after all, they might just be falling head over heels for you!
If things are going really well, this may even be a great time to introduce casual touch. You can maybe touch their arm while you talk or maybe even something a little more like holding their hand or putting your arm around them (just be sure they are comfortable with it)!
Be a Little Romantic
You don’t have to go crazy with this one, but a little romance never hurt anyone. When you first meet up, tell them they look nice and if they’re comfortable with it, maybe even give them a greeting hug. Be sure to be polite – for example, offer to hold doors open for them.
Be sure to give little compliments throughout the date (don’t overdo it), so consider little things like “you smell nice” or compliment something they tell you they are doing or have done. If you keep up with this one, chances are it will lead straight to their heart.
Closing the Date
When the date is coming to a close, tell them you’ve had a good time! Thank them for spending the time with you, and if you are interested in going on another date, then let them know in person! Even something simple like “I had a great time tonight and would love to see you again” can really plant the idea and get them thinking about whether or not they would like to see you again as well!
Then be sure to follow up! Message them and remind them that you had a great time. Also, tell them that you hope they had a good time as well. Maybe even ask them if they made it home safe. Last, say you hope you’ll be able to see them again, but maybe wait a day or two to make actual plans to meet again.
Want even more tips on how to have a perfect first date? Check these out!
- A Great First Date: The Guide to this Postmodern Love
- Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
- 121 First Dates: How to Succeed at Online Dating, Fall in Love, and Live Happily Ever After (Really!)
The perfect date is going to depend on the person, the couple, and even where you live. Especially in the world we’ve been living in recently, dating can be hard! But that’s what we love about these tips: they can be translated to almost every date and location. Even if you’re planning something at home, make sure you have something to do and spark conversation! By following these tips, you are sure to have at least a less awkward date and hopefully one that will result in a second!
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