Love is a complicated thing that involves internal feelings. From the first date to the wedding ceremony, there are many twists, turns, intense feelings, and emotions that take place. And one thing most people realize is that the way they feel about their partner changes over time – and that doesn’t always mean negatively, it can be positive feelings.

If you’re wondering about the difference between compassionate vs passionate love, you’re not alone. These are two very valid kinds of love, and most people feel both of them during a span of a relationship.

Knowing the difference between compassionate and passionate love can help you determine your true romantic feelings about a relationship – and that’s precisely what this article is talking about today.

Compassionate vs Passionate: What is Passionate Love?

compassionate vs passionate

The first type of love being discussed today is passionate love. This type is being mentioned first because it typically arises during the onset of a new relationship.

To put it simply, you’re less likely to have a passionate love or feeling of enthusiasm 20 years down the road compared to the first few months, otherwise known as the “honeymoon stage.” However, that’s not to say that you can’t be a passionate couple or passionate people that remain passionate about each other forever.

But what exactly is the term passion or passionate love?

The best way to describe the meaning of passion is an intense longing or a strong desire for another individual. It can be hard to be without them, and when you’re with them, it feels like the most fantastic and powerful feeling in the world. They’re on your mind constantly, and you can’t get enough of them. The flames of passion bring out those strong feelings you have for each other.

Passionate love can be requited or unrequited.

Requited love

Describes two individuals sharing the same intense passion and strong feelings for one another. They can describe themselves as a passionate couple that has that feeling of enthusiasm.

Unrequited love

This is when only one person has an intense passion and the other does not have that intense romantic feeling. However, it can include relationships that can’t be together for one reason or another. Think Romeo and Juliet!

Characteristics of Passionate Love

compassionate vs passionate

Are you unsure whether or not you fall into the category of passionate love? Then consider these things:

Do you think about the person incessantly?

Someone who is involved in an intense passion with another individual will think about them nonstop which is one of the big differences between passion and love. It may seem challenging to get anything done. You might even struggle to fall asleep at night because your mind is overwhelmed with thoughts and strong emotions about the other individual.

Do you think this person is perfect?

People engaging in passionate love can feel that the other individual can do no wrong. They’re the “perfect person,” the person of their dreams. Therefore, they’re the perfect match and can’t imagine their life with anybody else.

Do you want to know every little detail about this person?

Passionate lovers want to know everything about the person they’re engaging with. Everything from their favorite color to their most profound, darkest secret, deep intimacy details. Not only that, but the passionate lover wants this person to know everything about them, too, which can sometimes lead to oversharing things that should be in the public domain.

Are you having intense emotions regarding this person?

When everything’s going well, you may feel unstoppable. But when things go sour – for instance, you fight with the other person – you can feel like your life is in shambles.

Do you want to be around this person 24/7, 365?

An intense desire to be around someone constantly is a clear indicator that you’re dealing with passionate love. That said, think about how often you want to be around them and how you feel when they’re not around. You may have feelings of despair and an undeniable longing to get back to them. And when you’re finally with them, you want plenty of physical touches – holding hands, hugging, kissing, etc.

Compassionate vs Passionate: What is Compassionate Love?

compassionate vs passionate

When it comes to the great compassionate vs. passionate love debate, there is one clear difference: compassionate love can be described as a “toned down” version of passionate love. So, it is not the exact opposite of passionate love, but it’s not as “intense” and that’s the key difference.

That is why compassionate love occurs later in the relationship when the “honeymoon phase” has worn down and you feel more comfortable with the individual. With compassionate love, there is a clear sense of long-term commitment, love, adoration, and affection without being over the top, incessant or urgent for obsessive passion.

There are three significant indicators that you’re involved in compassionate love:

The relationship has been going strong for a while

How long have you been in this committed relationship? If it’s been several years or even months, then you might be in the compassionate love phase. Compassionate love will occur when there is a genuine and long-lasting commitment.

There is intimacy beyond the physical

The first few weeks and months of a relationship can seem like a whirlwind experience. You don’t know the person that well, but you still have an intense passion to be with them and learn everything about them.

Over time, the relationship will become more about physical touch. The intimacy will be defined by knowing and trusting this person entirely. You will be able to share anything and everything with this individual without fear of losing them or other consequences.

There is mutual trust

Lastly, those in compassionate love will fully trust one another. They have reached a level of comfort and confidence that they don’t feel rushed or intense. The love comes naturally, and they can relax while being utterly passionate about their partner.

Why Are Some People Compassionate and Others Passionate Lovers?

compassionate vs passionate

Now that you know compassionate vs. passionate love, it’s essential to understand how these types of love come about. Three major things influence whether someone will be a compassionate or passionate lover.

Willingness for Love

Someone who is not open to falling in love will likely experience neither of these types of love.

Level of Security

Some people take the low and slow approach, in which case they can form compassionate and long-lasting love types. On the other hand, those who are more anxious and insecure may fall in love quickly and have intense passion.


Compatibility plays a significant role in passion and compassionate love. For instance, two people who are compatible in terms of looks and personality may find themselves falling into a passionate love that, over time, turns into a compassionate and long-lasting relationship.

Two people who are not compatible will struggle to feel feelings of compassionate or passionate love.

There is also the issue of one person feeling compatible while the other does not. In this circumstance, one person may have feelings of intense passion while the other doesn’t share feelings whatsoever.

What Type of Love Do You Share With Your Partner?

After reading this info on compassionate vs. passionate love, it’s time to decide which type of love style you are engaged in. Are you someone who falls in love fast and has feelings of intense passion for the person you’re with? Do you still share these feelings after years of being in a relationship with your partner, or has it settled down into compassionate love?

Regardless of which type of lover you are or what category your relationships fall under, know that both styles are entirely normal. It’s simply dependent on the individuals involved and how long they’ve been together.

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